Chapter twenty-four.

Constantly worn out, hungry, suffering, disappointed, angered, frustrated by the seemingly endless bad decisions people make around me. When I was younger and made such decisions, I didn't realize how frustrating or annoying such things were. I am responsible for fifty-three Boys' physical, mental, emotional, and most importantly, spiritual development. Yes, I am not their only guardian, nor the sole provider of these needs, but one of many contributors. I accepted this charge of my own accord, not under duress, but out of a firm belief that I am able to steer lives onto their Creator-intended paths, and away from the rocks of cynicism, unbelief, mediocrity and lifelong misery.

I can only pray, dear Lord, that I do not fail in my ministry to these foolhardy, carefree individuals who are gradually coming to terms with the world they live in. As they mature in the physical, it is only my sincerest prayer that none of them fail to mature in the latter three aspects, since the inward self matters more than excellence of one's outward appearance.

My eyes are not fixed on what is seen, nor does my hope rest in men. If it were so, I would have quit doing this suffersome duty a long time ago. Though I have a duty, I have a Lord too, whose concern for these souls is greater than mine. My role is not to overtake His plan, but to move along with it, doing my part as He performs His greater, yet even more silent parts. Though I seem a trifle small alongside Him, this is my story for all eternity.

Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain. - 1 Corinthians 15:58

Rainy days.

I dislike rainy days. I dislike the fact that I have to go on and continue my activities in the rain, getting my shoes, and potentially, my clothes all damp. When I see dark clouds gathering, and the foreboding clap of thunder, I think about how the weather is going to hinder my day. If I planned to play outdoors, there would probably be a need to change to an indoor venue. If I planned to cycle, I would have to take public transport. If I planned to drive, I would have to drive at a slower speed, and with greater care. In short, rain ruins my plans.

So it is with my life in the spirit, because I dislike having my plans ruined. But it was the Lord for my life, and so it shall now be my life for the Lord. As such, my comfort for His purposes, His plans and His glory, which lasts forever and ever. Bring the rain, Jesus, bring it on.

Many are the plans in the mind of a man,but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand. - Proverbs 19:21